Pursuing your Healer, Not Just Your Healing

…As a result of my simple obedience I was overcome by His presence, reassured of His love, and strengthened in my faith. Just the night before, I had been awakened, yet again, by a spirit of fear. Sensing that Holy Spirit was about to do something powerful, the enemy was trying to harass me and immobilize my faith. I had awoken with great trepidation and apprehension in trying this whole nicotine idea. But by joining in agreement with Bobby the following morning and stepping out in faith, that spirit of fear was immediately dealt with, and the joy of the Lord flooded my soul.

“And without faith it is impossible to please Him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that He exists and that He rewards those who seek Him.” (Hebrews 11:6)

Interestingly, I was surprised to realize that the ring in my ear was still there. Even as I was experiencing the powerful presence of the Lord, my ear was still ringing! So, even as I took in this powerful encounter, I instinctively knew this journey was far from over. This was not the culmination of my faith, nor was this the key to my healing. And as amazing as this sudden visitation was, it wasn’t the high point of my journey. It was only the beginning.

That first dose was just the start of ongoing visitations and encounters with the Lord. The nicotine protocol called for me to chew nicotine gum four times a day. I had only taken the first dose that morning and had three more to go. Upon taking the second dose a few hours later, I was stunned when the same thing happened. Five minutes after chewing the gum, the Holy Spirit came upon me again in the same measure and I had to sit down to take it all in. Lasting almost an hour, His overwhelming presence was just as strong and just as surprising.

This continued with the third and fourth dose that day – and continued the next day, and the next – after every dose. The tangible and powerful presence of the Lord descended upon me each and every time I took a dose of this strange protocol. What became rather humorous was that instead of becoming addicted to nicotine, I was becoming addicted to His presence! And that’s exactly what He wanted. He was teaching me how to recognize His tangible presence and to set aside whatever I was doing and simply yield. Because His weight was so strong, I had already known to sit down whenever I took a dose so I wouldn’t keel over somewhere and hurt myself. It was apparent that He was taking me much deeper than anticipated and giving me keys to healing that I’d never considered. The reality was, even if my body wasn’t being physically healed yet in the way I expected, my soul and spirit were being radically healed and transformed. His presence became my medicine. Literally!

In each of these encounters, He revealed something different about His character. He would show me His love, His tenderness, His power, and many other aspects of His nature. One Sunday afternoon, I was overwhelmed with His beauty. I had never felt impressed by this before, and my heart was overwhelmed when He poured over me a liquid love and revelation of how beautiful He was. I wept and rejoiced in this new revelation and actually told Him to stop as I didn’t think my physical body could handle so much glory! The truth was – what had started as a nightmare a few months before was now turning into heavenly encounters I never could have imagined. I was finding HIM. 

(excerpt from WORDS FOR HEALING)