Feeling grumpy comes naturally to many of us when life doesn’t go as we hoped. I admit I get that way more than I would like. Let’s explore how love is not irritable, based on 1 Corinthians 13, often referred to as the ‘love chapter’ in the Bible, which many of us have likely heard before.
When I consider the various aspects of love, I get frustrated because I often don’t live up to the ideals I aspire to. However, God doesn’t expect us to possess all those qualities at once. Instead, they create a path we can follow to learn how we can love more like God loves us.
Jesus Christ exemplifies perfect love, and we are not Him. As humans, we fall short in our ability to love ourselves and others unconditionally.
I Don’t Like Feeling Grumpy
When I act grumpy, it upsets the people around me, especially my husband, but others notice it too. I spoke with a woman who shared a list of problems she faced in her life and expressed how miserable she felt. After I gathered more details, I asked her where she thought her misery originated.
She explained that she felt anxious, frustrated, and worried because several members of her family had gotten ill one after another. I referred to this as “sickness-itis.” I don’t know what your “itis” might look like, but at times I have “frustration-it is” or “expectation-itis.”
Expectation Management
I struggle with what I like to call “expectation-it is.” I put too much pressure on myself and expect to complete tasks faster than they get done. This leads to feelings of frustration and anxiety, which makes me irritable. As a result, I become moody with my husband, and I don’t always treat him as nicely as I should.
Love is not irritable. If no one ever got cranky or prickly, the world would be very different. However, as people, many of us face this struggle at some point in our lives. Then we must learn how to control our tempers and improve our communication skills. What can we do to avoid feeling grumpy today? These tips can help us manage our feelings of irritability.
When You Feel Irritable
1. Get More Rest: Feeling tired often leads to irritability. When you find yourself feeling cranky, the best solution is to take a nap and calm down.
2. Don’t Skip Meals: Many of us become irritable or quick-tempered, even angry, when we feel hungry. To avoid this “hangry” feeling, eat healthy meals and have nutritious snacks with you.
3. Be Aware of Your Monthly Cycle: I’ve noticed that my mood changed from happy to grumpy within an hour when I had my period. First, recognize when to expect the hormone shifts. During those times, I planned more alone time and slowed my schedule to allow for extra rest.
4. Take a Moment to Think: Ask yourself, “What can I do to decrease my irritability?” Do I need to get my car fixed, schedule a doctor’s appointment, talk with a friend, or a life coach?
5. Find a Prayer Partner: As believers, we benefit from having a close girlfriend with whom we can share our prayer requests or send a text and ask her to pray. Letting someone else know our needs reminds us that God is still in control and will guide our steps when we turn to Him.
6. Drop Unnecessary Tasks: If we fill our schedules to the brim and take on too much, then we may neglect our self-care, our husbands, or time with the Lord. This lifestyle leads to irritability. Take a good look at your schedule. What does God want you to focus on now? What can wait?
Do You Have Too Much on Your Schedule?
If you answered “yes,” then it’s no surprise that you’re feeling frustrated. Maybe you can relate to this story.
A mother with a three-year-old son told me she planned to start teaching again full-time as soon as he started kindergarten. I suggested we look at what she did for her other children. We discussed the activities she drove them to and her church responsibilities. She recalled how she managed to make time for her husband, household chores, exercise, and self-care.
Then I asked her how adding a full-time job would impact her current schedule. She thought for a while, then concluded she couldn’t add another responsibility without sacrificing many of the activities she considered necessary.
She needed a job that utilized her unique skills while still allowing her to balance the rest of her life. After searching for a while, she found several part-time positions that suited her circumstances well.
Complaining Sounds Irritating
When we complain, we become irritable, and often those around us do too. For instance, when I complain a lot, my husband tends to respond with, “Okay, whatever you want,” and then he walks away.
I told my husband about an issue with my car’s air conditioner. I explained that the problem made sense to me because my car was well over 10 years old. Then he told me to stop arguing with him.
Oh no, I hadn’t realized I came across as argumentative and irritated. I took a moment, collected my thoughts, and realized I needed an appointment to have my car checked. Could they fix it? I didn’t feel optimistic as it’s an older car, but my husband thought it could be fixed. I needed to find out for sure.
If Your Spouse or Friend Is Irritable
If our husband or a friend seems irritable, there are effective ways to respond. Try saying phrases like, “I hear you” or “Oh, okay. ” These simple responses can often defuse a potential argument.
After acknowledging their feelings, it’s best to walk away rather than stay there and escalate the conflict. Please don’t engage in a fight; it won’t improve the situation. Instead, come back and discuss the issue later when both parties have had a chance to calm down.
This is an updated edition of a post originally published on Joyce Zook
