It Can’t Be Me

Bottles deep in endless drink

Recycled empty words.

Broken promises the innocent don’t deserve.

I wanted to fill the space

With a soft and safe embrace.

A rock for all I’d be.

But over and over

Crushed by sad retreat

I learned, it couldn’t be me.

It couldn’t be my endless words

Meant to lift and rise.

It couldn’t be my emotional pleas

Spoken with tear-filled eyes.

It couldn’t be a helpful hand,

Or tired arms carrying a tired soul.

It couldn’t be holding on

To one who chose to let go.

Desperate hope could not win.

Useless, I failed.

It takes you to begin.

And leave addiction’s hell.

All I did or did not do

In attempt to save

Was useless against addictions destination

Of hospital, jail, or grave.

Truth appeared in mysterious fears

That haunted my heart to see.

And through this unmapped painful place

I break. Knowing it can’t be me.

I can’t call upon the wind

To stop the storm

That rips the seams away

My words can’t change one’s own will

Or stop the inner rage.

I can’t force love

In overwhelming hate.

I can’t be more when I am less

And here I cannot stay.

But I’ll sit in solitude,

Pray for what can be.

But know what I know,

No matter what, it can’t be me.

This is an updated edition of a post originally published on Authentic Truths

Featured Image by Kat Smith on Pexels.com

About the Author

Lisa Wenninger is a speaker, writer, podcaster, and Kingdom Winds Collective member. She currently manages a local church with a family of believers she loves. Lisa enjoys volunteering as a Stephen Minister and being able to walk alongside others in their time of need. She is an animal lover (former assistant to the director at this fantastic location), a beach enthusiast, and enjoys hiking, museums, and eating out. Fun fact - she loves to sing but says that you don’t want to hear her do it.

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