The Stages Of a Fight
Change our focus from “telling” to “listening.”
Change our focus from “telling” to “listening.”
Any other hope we find in this life outside of Christ is but a shadow of His divine hope.
You can work on finding peace and fulfillment through your relationship with God.
God can and will take the broken pieces of our marriages and redeem the hurt.
God is faithful to you even when your spouse is not.
I’ve continued to try new ways to remind myself that my husband needs a loving touch.
It’s so much easier to focus on your spouse’s sin than your own, right?
See yourself through His eyes, and that’s where you’ll find you are part of a true love story!
When things on earth were breaking down, that is the perfect time to seek heaven’s intervention.
Our goal should be to value masculinity and femininity – both were created by God and are essential to a happy marriage!
The further we move toward Satan’s deceptions, the more people in our lives get hurt and the deeper our marriage wounds grow.
In an instant, it was me who needed to make a change! It was me who was falling down on the job!
God is able to do mighty things through our submission and faith in Him.
Pray that God would open your eyes to His big and little gifts all throughout your day.
Not only is timing key in knowing when to shelve a conflict till a later time but also in approaching sticky topics.
God has a plan for you and it’s a good one, but like any good story, it’s full of mystery and suspense!
Let your mental focus be on the offended, instead of on your pain.
It’s a slippery slope that must be managed with care and caution.
You won’t find a “human” on this earth who can fill the role of soul-mate, that job is reserved only for Christ.
Learning to work through our conflicts in a healthy way has become an extremely important part of our bonding as a couple.
When I’m hurt, it’s as if a huge chasm develops between me and my husband.
It’s worth evaluating and reassessing a plan or you’re bound to repeat the mistakes of your past.
What I need to remember when I feel up against the wall, is that controlling the wall is NOT my only option.
If you’re pursuing “infatuation” more than love, then you’re putting your marriage at risk!
May this post bring you greater clarity on when to confront and when to surrender the situation to God.
Each day as I pour out my heart in prayer, I’m reminded of my willful, independent, rebellious choices.
My heart is bound to be crushed and even kicked to the curb because Jesus never promised me deliverance from pain in this life.
There’s this sacred connection that can happen when we learn to validate, but when we offer a counterfeit, it instead creates walls.
Help for gaining perspective.
The reason empathy is so important is that it is a key ingredient in being able to forgive your spouse.
When the pathway seemed the darkest, God was refining us and strengthening us the most!
Retreat to the One who is for you and wants to calm your hurts and fears.
Believe the best about your spouse and point this “best” out to him or her instead of pointing out the worst.
We need to be sharing encouraging words with our spouses whenever we get the chance.
Healing comes through the truth we share and the support and accountability we receive.
What better way to pray for your marriage than to quit focusing on how your spouse is the problem.
Without His Word challenging my heart daily or His Spirit convicting me of sin, I wouldn’t be able to truly “die.”
On that summer evening my developmentally disabled child had an encounter with a Living God that changed him.
There are also a lot of ways that I think I’m helping my husband when I’m really hurting him or blocking his growth.
The bedrock of my marriage has not been being the best wife, but being a fully devoted follower of Christ.
He recognizes all the things that I do daily in our home and for our family.
I will wait and trust that He is indeed very busy in our lives and marriages.
We all need to know that our “hearts” are understood, known, and liked by our spouses.
But the truth is that I should show more honor to my spouse—even when the heat is on—not less.
We often (pardon the pun) “lose sight” of the way to take that speck out of our lives.
Becoming aware of and acknowledging the unhealthy patterns you tend to repeat will give you a starting point to deal with them.
Make a habit of coming clean with your spouse and others about your failures.
What would happen if we quit worrying so much about our own feelings and instead set out to protect our spouses’ feelings?
There are many significant ways you can improve your marriage without your spouse’s direct cooperation.
Realize that Christ is the One who waits for you to yield this mess to Him.
Whenever we feel we’re unable to escape an overwhelmingly frustrating or oppressive situation, depression has a tendency to develop.
It’s sort of like the old saying, “You can’t unring that bell.”
When we resist positive change and embrace the status quo, we are trying to manage our world.
When I focus on getting my spouse to change, rather than choosing to change myself, what I end up doing is manipulating him.
Without margin, we will be existing or simply “surviving,” rather than really living or thriving.
Instead of making your temper your god, turn to the One true God to help you calm the anger that surges.
We can easily become consumed with anger toward our spouses because we retrace the hurt over and over in our brains.
Keep in mind that there are many factors for why your spouse (or yourself, for that matter) does what he/she does.
You trust that God will protect you and provide for your needs in the face of rejection from your spouse.
I had chosen this helpless stance as surely as I chose what outfit I wanted to wear each day or the breakfast that I wanted to eat.
God uses the paradoxical “dying to self for the greater good” in powerful and healing ways in marriage.
It was then that I realized that my father was a flawed, skin and bones creature of dust … just as I was and am.
Sometimes it’s our view of God that creates friction and distance in a marriage.
If you truly understand the gravity of His sacrifice, you’ll be quick to extend that same forgiveness to your spouse.
There are some risks that come with being authentic.
Shame comes to stay and keeps the deception firmly in place.
I know for me there are times when my husband doesn’t inspire me to love him in a dying-to-self kind of way, nor do I inspire him—far from it!
I hope that you aren’t becoming discouraged by the hardness you are facing.
I knew that my pride was the only thing keeping me from apologizing.
The faces and places may be different, but the situations and problems are still the same.
Life will always be a mixed bag of blessings and curses.
God commands us to “… always protect, always trust, always hope …” in the ones we love.
God redeems not only the messes in my marriage but also the mess that I am.
Becoming in tune with how you feel will help you tune into other’s feelings, including your spouse’s.
When we do something new, it creates new pathways in our brains, helping us to banish boredom and invite exhilaration into our relationships and lives.
It’s not your job to convince your spouse of his guilt.
Any pain I experience in life directly affects not just my attitude but all of my relationships, including and especially my marriage.
Remember, you cannot change another person with boundaries. You can only influence or inspire that person to change.
He needs to be wooed by your kind interest in him and your willingness to listen.
If there’s a passion in your life that pulls you away from the passion you should have for your spouse, it needs to be surrendered or brought back into balance.
I want to learn to serve my husband with the same grace and forgiveness that my Savior showed and still shows to you and me today.
I had to admit my fault, my sins, my irritating humanness.
Finding my voice and helping others find theirs is so important to living with purpose and truly connecting positively with those we love.
I’m committed to challenging my negative inner voice with God’s truth.
God not only notices our sacrifice, but he also blesses our willingness to experience and express painful love to our spouses.
Don’t interrupt the flow of the parental moment, and remain a united front with your spouse in times of correction.
We need to make sure our spouse knows we still find him or her attractive.
When I was a child, my teenage sister served as my mother’s source of emotional support and validation.
Whenever two imperfect people with the baggage of their personalities and pasts come together, there are bound to be some major meltdowns.
Timing is key to handling conflict in a healthy and responsible way.
As a couple, we need to have the policy of being for each other not against one another.
There’s a hidden bonus in remembering and accepting the fact that our spouse is human.
Healing takes place as we take ownership of our faults and sins.
Just as we are committed to love our spouses for a lifetime, we need to commit to the task of forgiveness for a lifetime.
My husband, Gary, and I have learned to turn from fighting each other to fighting the problem instead.
Often vicious cycles begin because people are reacting rather than responding.
Without leadership, any organization, including the family, will fracture and degenerate into ineffectiveness at best, and conflict and total breakdown at worst.
Picture Jesus on the receiving end of every act and attitude of grace you extend to your spouse!
Instead of jumping into defensive mode, drop your defenses and trust God to bind your marital wounds. He’s never failed me when I’ve given it over to Him.
Without intentionally scheduling times of rest in our lives and families, our marriages will suffer.