Like alchemy, when an element combines with another, otherwise corrosive material to form a benign compound, so the very things that make us unapproachable (like rage or addiction) when combined with authenticity, actually makes us more approachable.” —Peter Randell
Let’s unpick the wise truth set out above. For those valiant enough to try it, especially those who are leaders, there’s a secret for growth unearthed in the absolutely paradoxical step of sharing our weakness, our guilt, our shame.
Think of the sheer strength it takes to confess one’s temptations, fear, sadness, rage, etc. One before another, as that which is corrosive to you when you keep it in, like poison, when it’s shared in trustworthy spaces, it gives life to the sharer and to the receiver alike.
Indeed, the receiver observes with their own heart, ears, and eyes, that which could have eaten them away from inside, but now with the other person’s authenticity, INVITES them to share too.
There’s no fear for judgment when another person’s gone first in declaring their struggle.
There’s no corrosive value left in a poison of a hidden struggle when it’s neutralized by the agent of truth.
There’s no power then for the accuser to have his way. Weakness avowed takes strength and the good Lord honors that courage every time!
This brings life to the idea of “when I am weak, then I am strong.” Do you know who uttered those incredibly bizarre words? Yes, the apostle Paul, in 2 Corinthians 12:10.
Here’s where it matters. When we’re weakest, we’re isolated, and from isolation, the mind gets to work, and a sinkhole we begin to sink into. But as soon as we sense the readiness to connect with another human being, that one also ripe for connection, together with a sprinkle of honest authenticity, that is sharing what is deeply true yet also shaming, life comes in like a beacon.
What is true in the world of chemistry is also true psychologically through this sociological phenomenon:
Strong acids and alkalis, those chemicals that range to the extremes on both sides of a pH scale, are neutralized discretely by other chemicals to produce a harmless compound.
Think of indigestion and antacids. Relief and comfort come from the sweet authenticity of the truth that’s required. From the rising pain of the gut up to the trachea comes relief when that acid is neutralized.
That’s the power of authenticity. When you carry truth into your safe conversations, dialogue where truth is welcome, that truth empowers both of you.
One morsel of truth is enough to taste and see, freedom’s there in abundance, it’s there for you and me.
This is an updated edition of a post originally published on Tribework
