6 Ways to Fall Back In Love With Your Husband

If you’re looking to fall back in love, it’s important to focus on liking your husband first!

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I bet you never thought you’d be reading an article with this title, did you? And yet, here you are. It’s probably safe to say that you’re struggling in your marriage, but don’t worry, I’ve got some good news for you—you’re here! And that’s big! 

You’re already doing the very first thing you need to do. You’re trying.

Another piece of good news is that falling back in love IS POSSIBLE!

Yep, that’s right. Love, while most know it as a feeling, is also a choice. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 gives us an entire list of actions you can choose to actively love your husband with. And guess what? There are no rules that say you have to actually feel like doing these things to start them, but here you go:

  • Patience
  • Kindness
  • Selflessness
  • Being slow to anger
  • Letting go of wrongs
  • Not keeping score
  • and so on…

It’s important to know that while you’re waiting on feelings to return, you can still choose love. I also think it’s safe to say that God is going to use all that love in action to reignite that missing spark—which leads me to the third piece of good news—He is for your marriage, so you’ve got a HUGE power player on your side!

How to Fall Back in Love with your Husband

Typically, there is a reason for losing those feelings of love, and it’s usually because you have not felt loved or been treated, what you would call well, by your husband. You may have been begging him to plug into your marriage for a while and now that he finally has, your heart has moved on, and it feels too late. Before you completely shut that door, I hope you will give these things a try and allow God to redeem and restore what has been lost.

Start here:

Practice gratitude. Focus on what your husband does right.
Focus on what you do still like about him and be thankful for those things. It can be as simple as, “I’m grateful for a husband who cooks dinner—who is a good father, heck, a husband who puts the toilet lid down.” Walking with an attitude of gratitude has a lot of benefits, one of them being it ignites love.

Remember he is God’s son. If you have children, you already know how you want them to be treated. God is no different. Just like you would want your child to be valued, respected, and cared for, that’s what God wants for His children too. Focus on him as a child of God instead of a husband you’re no longer sure about.

Play and have fun. Go back and focus on your friendship again. Friendship and fun are a foundational part of any healthy relationship. If you’re looking to fall back in love, it’s important to focus on liking your husband first!

Get to know him better. People grow and change over time, and chances are your husband has too. Start asking him questions that will help you learn more about him and understand where he’s at in life right now. 

Pray for him. It’s difficult to have bad feelings towards someone you are praying for. On top of that, praying for him also invites God into work in his life as well as yours. 

Lastly, Relax and take the pressure off. While you’re working on your marriage and trying to fall back in love with your husband, be sure to not work too hard. Make room for your love to naturally unfold like it did when you first fell in love. Remember those days and what you loved about him then and just take the pressure off and allow it to happen all over again


This is an updated edition of a post originally published on Expedition Marriage

Featured Image by Pexels from Pixabay


The views and opinions expressed by Kingdom Winds Collective Members, authors, and contributors are their own and do not represent the views of Kingdom Winds LLC.

About the Author

Chris and Jamie Bailey are professional Christian counselors and marriage coaches. They run their private practice as well as online ministry, Expedition Marriage, from their home in Fort Mill, SC. They are the parents of three adult daughters and two adorable grandchildren. Together they run weekend marriage retreats, offer guest speaking, one day seminars, as well as run workshops in person and online. Together they hope to encourage Christian marriages and help them thrive abundantly.