On the Dad-Hackers Podcast, we’ve been going through a series on Raising Mature, Internally Motivated, Christ-Following Children. I wanted to get more of this much-needed information out there, so below is an excerpt from one of the recent episodes we just published.
I want to note that, to be an effective parent, you must implement 3 things well: Good Theology, Good Strategy, and Good Technique.
Theology refers to an understanding that God created everyone with intrinsic value and worth, but He also created each person with a unique temperament, personality, and disposition. This includes each of your children. Good theology also means that you understand the Bible as a whole and how God relates to His children as a heavenly Father. We can learn much about parenting from studying how God parents us.
Strategy refers to the specific plan that you develop and tweak over time to help your child get from where he or she is now to where you believe he or she should be. As you work with your child, you’ll learn what works and what doesn’t work. You’ll learn more about him/her and how to better equip him/her with what he/she needs to be successful in life and what alterations you need to make to your plan.
Technique refers to the actual things that you implement. There are many techniques available out there. Some are good, some are bad, and some are devastating to the relationship you are working to develop with your child. Often, we want to go straight to the technique without having a good theological foundation for parenting or a good strategy in place. This is why many parents end up second-guessing what they do with their child and jump from technique to technique.
Many parents fall into the trap of “reactive parenting” which is just reacting to whatever situation or problem comes up concerning their children with whatever technique comes to mind at the time. They don’t have a plan in place, and they haven’t done the work of developing a specific strategy.
Your techniques will flow out of good theology and the specific strategy you develop.
Hope that helps!
Thank you so much!
Founder, Dad Hackers and Iron Men
Featured Image by Sebastián León Prado